THE ACADEMY FOR MARRIAGE AND LOVE

It is time to love. The bride of Christ—the Church, needs to prepare herself to meet her heavenly Bridegroom. Just as natural couples are encouraged to have open, honest, and direct discussions of the intimate things that take place in the natural marriage bed—in the same manner, humanity needs to have open, honest, and direct discussions of the intimate nature of a new humanity—those who are about to become one with Christ.  Just as Calvary is a “Mount of lovers”—an “academy for lovers,” in the same manner, in God’s design for marriage, He takes the two—husband and wife—broken in weaknesses, scared, and affected because they have copied the behavior, customs, and lifestyles of this world, and knits them, and the two are united into one flesh.  He creates something beautiful and miraculous—not because either person came into marriage perfect. Sexual intercourse is God’s instrument through which the “oneness” —”one flesh” is achieved.

The human family is the basic unit of society. The human family was designed and created by God Almighty, to fulfill human basic needs such as shelter, cloth, food etc.  The human family ensures the love and security for family members. The human family is the starting point from which we start to make social relationships— develop and sustain such relationships.  The human family is the God’s academy for marriage and love. Marriage is God’s spiritual laboratory, and an undefiled and pure marriage bed, is God’s laboratory bench—laboratory table. In God’s spiritual laboratory—marriage, the man and his wife would learn and practice to serve one another humbly in love.

The Bible—Our Marriage Manual

All Scripture is God—breathed [given by divine inspiration] and is profitable for instruction, for conviction [of sin], for correction [of error and restoration to obedience], for training in righteousness [learning to live in conformity to God’s will, both publicly and privately behaving honorably with personal integrity and moral courage] (2 Timothy 3:16).  This biblical verse paints on artistic portrait of the “Word of God” or “all Scripture” to be an academic book—a curriculum—in which God’s instruction for living life on earth are written.  What is a curriculum? A curriculum is a collection of lessons, assessments, and other academic content that’s taught in a school, program, or class by a teacher or an instructor. A standard curriculum typically consists of the following parts: a purpose statement: “What will this curriculum achieve?” To build on this foundational framework, the Spirit of God says the following in the book of Joshua.

Joshua 1:8 (NIV)
“Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”

When Joshua talks of the book of the law, he is referring to the Books of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy, which are all centered around God’s creation and the laws He passed down, from the very beginning, to guide faithful living—a prosperous and successful life. These five books are grouped as books of Law. In these books are the rules that God passed down to guide His people as they lived their lives.

Deuteronomy 11:18-20

“Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates,”

This Biblical passage draw an artistic picture of an academic environment. A school is an environment or community that is designed for the pursuit of research, education, and scholarship. It is an organization that provides instruction—an institution for the teaching of children and adults.  A school could also be referred to as an educational institution, a center of learning, a college, or an academy.

God created us with certain features that He has defined and clarified in His operational manual—the Bible. Books are used in school for instruction and learning. This same principle applies to the Bible, and the academy for marriage and love.  The Bible is a diverse collection of different writings. It contains sixty—six books written by forty human authors, over nearly 2,000 years. It has two sections—the Old Testament and New Testament—written in two main languages—Hebrew and Greek respectively—and includes a mixture of types of   literature.

Marriage—God’s Spiritual Academy

Just as physical laboratories are found in schools, in the same manner, the human family is God’s design spiritual academy. In God’s design, marriage was to be His “spiritual laboratory”—in which He would draw a husband and his wife altogether—near to Him. It is written “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). A “pure and undefiled marriage bed” would become His spiritual laboratory bench—a table for procreation. In God’s design for sex, He wants humanity to procreate. He would bless humanity “Be fruitful and multiply.” The Bible would become His instructional manual—God’s instructional Book.

In God’s design, He took the man—humanity—and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it (Genesis 2:15). As spiritual farmers, God wants humanity to plow the hard grounds of their hearts—the human spirit—to plant the good seeds of righteousness to their spirits and to harvest crops of love—joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self—control. These virtues paint a picture of a heavenly lifestyle—the lifestyle of the kingdom of God.

We are to keep the “Book of the Law” always on our lips, meditate on the “Word of God” day and night and constantly seek God in prayers—that He may come and shower righteousness upon us. God wants us to teach our children—talk to them about the “Word of God.” When we sit at home—when we walk along the road—when we lie down and when we get up. God wants us to learn and practice the “Word of God.”  God wants us the learn and practice the lifestyle of the kingdom of God. He wants us to write them on the doorframes of our houses and on our gates.  God wants to cleanse humanity by the “Word of God.”  He wants to wash, sanctify, and justify the fallen humanity in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of God (1 Corinthians 6:11).

What God does not want us to do?

Genesis 2:16-17

And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”

God does not want us to cultivate wickedness, by sowing seeds of wickedness to the flesh and to harvest a thriving crop of sins—corruption and spiritual death. He does want us to eat the fruit of deception and lies—not to follow the false teaching—deeper wisdom of Satan.’ The kingdom of darkness calls its false teachings—depths of Satan. The law of prohibition stipulates—”you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil” (Genesis 2:17), God intends to protect humanity from not been led astray by false prophets, who intend to infiltrate the family system and teach its members how to commit sexual sin—to eat food offered to idols. God wants to protect family members from the acts of the flesh—sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. The act of the flesh is a lifestyle of the kingdom of darkness. Those who live such a lifestyle cannot inherit the kingdom of God.

In God’s spiritual laboratory—marriage, the man and his wife would learn and practice to serve one another humbly in love. This is because the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” The man and his wife would learn and practice walking by the Spirit, so that they will not gratify the desires of their flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit wants what is contrary to the flesh. They conflict with each other.

In God’s design for marriage, He takes the two people—husband and wife—broken in weaknesses, scared, and affected because they have copied the behavior, customs, and lifestyle of this world, and knits them, and the two are united into one flesh.  He creates something new, beautiful and miraculous—not because either person came into marriage perfect. God gradually transforms them into new persons, by changing the way they think, talk and act. This is how they would learn to know God’s will for them—practice God ways, which is good and pleasing and perfect.  Because nothing is impossible for God, He transforms and restores these two broken individuals—man and his wife—in glory and strength, into a spiritual man and woman. The man and his wife will eventually teach their children and household members what they have learned and practiced.  Eventually, their household will prosper and flourish because they have built it on a foundation of godly principles, godly rules, godly guidelines, truth working principles, the laws of God, the ordinances of God, the statutes, commandments, orders, decrees, and mandates of God.

Generally, marriage was designed to manifest the following characteristics: the passion for the needs of one another—the longing for togetherness—the longing to be desired—vulnerability, and the selfless giving of oneself. These characteristics reflect the incredible picture of God, and humanity—the bride of God.

 Ephesians 5:21-33 (NIV)

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

The common problem couples face in marriages today are just symptoms of a deeply rooted spiritual crisis. When our mindsets about sex are different from God’s design for sex—when we remove God from our marriages and sex life—the results are obvious—sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, divorce, envy, drunkenness, physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse etc.  Life is spiritual—our walk with God is spiritual, this is because God is Spirit.  In this light, sexual intercourse—sexual intimacy in marriage—is both a physical and spiritual exercise.

A “Pure and Undefiled Marriage Bed”—A Spiritual Laboratory Bench or Table

In God’s spiritual laboratory—marriage, couples were designed to read the Bible together—talk about their faith intimately, honestly, and openly with each other. The goal of this is to enable God—who is Love, to clothe the man and his wife with a garment of love—the bond of love—that which would bind them together in perfect harmony and agreement (Colossians 3:14) and would lead the couple to a deeper intimacy in their bedroom. Confessing their sins together—praying over their struggles together—rejoicing over God’s victories for them together—and understanding their imperfections, brokenness, and weaknesses together, would enable them to build true spiritual intimacy. This spiritual intimacy cleanses and removes pride, selfishness, shame, addiction, sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, divorce, envy, drunkenness, physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and all the worldly barriers that would want to sneak into their bedroom—to hurt their physical relationship and their spiritual intimacy with God. Couples who cultivate such a holy lifestyle or characters find the strength to forgive, to love, to accept each other and value themselves. Because they have brought the indwelling presence of God in their lives—the presence of God in their household—the Shekinah glory of God in the bedroom—the Spirit of God cleanses and sanctifies their marriage bed.  To build on this foundational framework the apostle Paul would record the following.

Hebrews 13:4 (AMPC)

Let marriage be held in honor (esteemed worthy, precious, of great price, and especially dear) in all things. And thus let the marriage bed be undefiled (kept undishonored); for God will judge and punish the unchaste [all guilty of sexual vice] and adulterous.

When we draw nearer to God with our spouses through His Word, we draw nearer to the One who designed and invented marriage and sex. In return, we find more blessings—the love, joy and procreation that come from God is infused into the marriage bed.

Procreation

In God’s design for sex, He wants us to procreate. He blessed humanity “Be fruitful and multiply.”

Psalm 127:3 (ESV)

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.

Genesis 9:1

 God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them: Be fertile and multiply and fill the earth. 

God created marriage and sex because He wants us to grow our families and produce more people who would reflect His image. He designs a woman in the image of a savior to men—women would give life to men and nurture them towards the light of Christ. Through conception, pregnancy, creation and bearing mortal beings, women would make it possible for God’s children to start on their spiritual journey here on earth and have the opportunity of becoming perfect in Christ. Women are the physical gateways through which spirits leave the spiritual realm and make their legal entries into the physical realm of the earth. By willing to sacrifice their own lives—to bring forth children into the world, women demonstrate the true meaning of charity and unconditional love. Their children are recipients of charity and unconditional love.  All these are possible through God’s design for marriage and sexual intimacy in marriage.